Mama S took me to the fair! Is she not lovely? She campaigned for me in the 509. After our ruckus on Friday she said no dice to taking Spot and I out in public, but she took me in spirit.

I'm in Denver right now trying to get a howl in edgewise. That Michele Obama is quite a stage hog.

Other than that, I have been keeping busy trying to impress the girls, its not working. I have been participating in fence races with Spider from the Happy Tails Home for Wayward Rottweillers next door. Timmy won but I came in second! He has much longer legs, so you figure out who is really the rock star.

Papa Joe took some pictures of the rodeo. I am certain that I would have been able to dress the sheep much better than these guys. They just wouldn't let me.
Stay tuned for more of me at Rancho Oxboro and Denver!

Ernest red bad, blue good

Do the words getting out of Dodge mean anything to you?

After causing quite the commotion the last few days as someone near and dear to me is starting to smell wonderful and girly, I have decided that retreat is the better part of valor and am making my way to Denver for the Democratic National Convention.

Well, I will once Papa J gives me a ride to the airport.

I wonder if they serve vitabones on such a short flight.

ernest house arrest, what house arrest basset

From the desk of Ernest basset esq.


Rain, rain go away.

We are very bored in the 509. It is raining and muddy and we are not amused.

We are picking on Nobel Spot as he is the youngest.

Poor spot.

It is supposed to stop raining soon.

I hope so because I cannot miss my flights to Denver for the DNC. I understand there is a groundswell of support for Ernest as veep.

Nmom neglected to buy an Ernest t shirt to wear to Greenland. She better get cracking.

Ernest who believes the revolution is just a t shirt away

Hi!

As I sweltered this weekend in the 509 a few things came to my mind...

Have you seen this story? It rocks.

Here were my questions to my nmom.

Why did they dress that bird up in a tuxedo?

When I become president can I knight birds?

How do you knight something that you can't reach?

Can presidents be knighted?

ernest who loves the knight life

Papa Joe is documenting my Summer Camp Experience.

Check it out here.

ernest heat advisory stricken basset to the masses

Today I am going to give some advice to those of you who may be trying to make a positive impression on new people -- this could be a job interview, a pitch for a product, meeting the new inlaws or just trying to speed date.

For your information, I have given lots of interviews and met lots of people in my short rein as the only basset hound worthy of the highest public office and know what I am talking about. These hints are solid, some of which I should follow myself on a regular basis.


1. Putting your paws in someone's crotch when you first meet them is not good form.
2. Don't forget to lift your leg before entering the room, not after you arrive.
3. Chewing on the pencils or table legs is probably not going to get you into the second round of
interviews.
4. References should be positive, so maybe not the one from the lady with the dead yew in her front garden.
5. If things are going bad, you can always roach or commando crawl and everyone will think you are cute and love you any way.

ernest workforce management consultant to the masses

From the desk of Ernest the Basset:

Papa Joe and Mama Stephanie came home early on Monday evening. I told them how happy I was to see them.

While they were gone, Spot the bad figured out how to open his kennel door. Kathy had to catch him and put him back in his kennel. He was living with Timmy the flat coat who did not go out the door.

This morning on the walk Phrace the Miscreant and Spot the Bad dug their way under the gate in the driveway. Everybody else including me The Good stayed in the yard. Mama Stephanie and Papa Joe spent two hours looking for Phrace the Miscreant and Spot the Bad. Papa Joe and Mama Stephanie finally went down to the creek. Papa Joe found them behind the neighbor’s house in the creek munching on dead squirrels! The neighbor shoots the squirrels and throws the carcasses down the embankment.

Mama Stephanie told Phrace and Spot that they were not going on the walks any more and will have to walk on leash until; the gate issue is solved.

I am being very good. I have eaten my food every day. I have not seen a squirrel but I did chase two cats! I miss you and I will be very happy to see you.

Sincerely and with great love of the couch,

Ernest basset esq.

cc: TH mom and my archivist, N.mom

Greetings from the 509. I have been here for eight days with many more to go as the moms have decided that all this back and forth to and froing to lockdown and home is killing them.

So, with Timmy the flat coat, the Nobel Spot and Phracey I play and squeak and bay.

So far it appears that the squirrels are winning. I have yet to catch one -maybe next week.

Bummer.

I am missing the moms a tiny bit, but I think they are really missing me the mostest. It is because of me they know exactly what the neighbors are drinking.

Papa J is supposed to give nmom a link to some pictures so that you can see what I am up to.

However, for now, you can look at a cute picture of me as a tiny basset puppy.

ernest don't fence me in basset

Ask Ms. Brador and ye shall receive.


Click here to see more of the family reunion.

Hi!

This weekend I had house guests - one two footed and two pawed and two four pawed.

Guess who?

Right -- Mama S, Phracey and Noble Spot!

It was fun.

I am tired.



We wrestled, we tugged, we fought and we napped. I used Spot's ear as a chew toy. It was delicious. In fact, it brought him good luck and he won best of opposite sex at dog show. Forget the buddha rubbing, let me chew on your ear for good luck and fortune.


Now I'm in the 509 hanging with my homies.

out for kibble ernest the puppy

The saddest thing.

Nmom got to meet Kubrin and Meggie and Boots, Cleo and Tealeaf last summer.

She writes about it here.

She will miss them all and I will miss their antics as well.

bassety updates:

In a little over 48 hours Phrace and Nobel Spot will be in the 98105!

Yesterday I hid all my precious stuffie/squeakies way up high so that not even Kubrin can get them. My sissie is hard on stuffies and I am in love with my squeakies from my grandmere.

TH mom promises that Phracey and I get to work on scaring the mean cats of the neighborhood.

Mama S. will get a nice steak dinner, some down time and everyone is going to come over to meet everyone! Is that cool or what?

Ficus, our ficus, is going into hiding as Nobel Spot is having a hard time distinguishing between indoor and outdoor trees.

Nmom is leaving (harumph) for a weekend of female bonding and camping and walking 37 miles. What a nut.

I'll be out of touch for a while after that, Mama S is taking me to Oxboro for the next six weeks. Not to fear, there will be updates galore and some of my deeper musings that I have been cogitating on for a while -- think of them as my position papers for the next regime.

ernest still sleeping, do not disturb

Oh hi.

I am back and tired and hoarse.

In less that 14 days Phracey and not so noble Spot arrive.

TH mom is girding for trouble.

ernest don't let the door hit you on the way out basset

This was my swollen nose. It is better now.

I am currently with Rocky, the basseherd and a pit cross. Apparently, we are having a good time running around and jumping on each other.

This may be reason enough to get me a bruddar.

ernest all basset all the time

I'm in lockdown, but without a roomie.

Please send one.

Scruffy, save me!

ernest jail bird basset

Kindly tell me what is wrong with this picture?

Nothing really, but what seems different?

Will it hurt my political career or will it bolster it?

ernest heading to lockdown

My nose is getting better but currently it is occupying half of the living room.

ernest whose nose knows

Update!

I have a humongous lopsided nose due to a yellow jacket that stung me yesterday.

I see benadryl, smooches and lots of naps in my future.

ernest now topping the scales at 51.5 lbs

Update: i'm at the vet. I seem to be having a foxtail crises.

Send help.

I am having a day.

I seem to be a bit lethargic which could be due to heat.

I am happy to eat my amendments and what biscuits are thrown my way.

I am not happy to eat kibble.

I am happy to curl up under a duvet in 80 degree weather.

I was bitten on my schnoz by a wasp. I am now lopsided.

Ernest thermoregulating and all that jazz

Oh Hi!

Where was I?

Right.

Three day weekend, busy moms and lots of walks.

All I can say is on the fourth of July I encountered four great danes at the dog park.

My neck still hurts from looking up.

We went to watch the fireworks. The oohing and aahing and flashing lights kept me up past my bedtime.

I hate that. However, the next day we all slept in until 6:20 am.

Is that cool or what?

ernest shh do not disturb

This morning nmom took me on my normal early morning walk.

She forgot to cook my squashes. We had udon noodles with chicken broth, kaffir lime leaves, mushrooms and chicken instead.

Mom needs to forget more often. It was delicious.

She went to do a bit of volunteering, came home to grab a cup of coffee and change for more appropriate work attire. I asked to go out. She leashed me up and off we went for a .....

ROACH! LAY DOWN! FLAT BASSET!

at 9:34 am.

Nmom while thinking it was cute really wanted to go to work. All my pleadings, passive agressiveness, adorableness and mind bending did not work this time to keep her at home with me.

Off she went to make the world safe against impending tidal waves and the data that is used to validate the models of such things.

So boring.

At least she came home early to take me for a walk and then spent some quality time eating bones in the back yard.

She did not do that (bone eating), but supervised my bone chewing.

Shouldn't one be able to call into work at least once a summer and say "I'm calling in well, my dog has decided that today would better be spent roaching and flat basseting than researching which filtering algorithm is appropriate for 15 second data".

ernest who thinks that wellness should be rewarded by a sick day

For the record, I would never pass up an opportunity to visit my Phracey.

love,

ernest

I am back in the 98105. Tired after zooming and terrorizing the others at the AOCB.

Guess what?

I'm going to be a basset in law!

Is that cool or what?

My uncle Al is getting married and his fiancée likes me more than he does. She has excellent taste. She offered to Ernest sit!

Woot!

Another round of Frosty Paws and turkey breast roll ups all around!

ring bearing/smooch toting ernest the puppy

[UPDATE]

I am rooming with Kaiser, a weimeraner and a yellow lab who is a distant cousin
of Miss La Brador.

Everything is coolio here. I do not miss my moms at all. Okay, well a little bit.

There are purportedly to be 29 basset hounds here at the Academy for a
party-meetup. They are trying to spring me so that I can work the crowd.

[/UPDATE]

In lockdown.

Send help.

Ernest dd

Since early May I have been waking nmom at 5:30 am to go on my walk. She is not that amused, but plays along. She muttered something about work, early, productivity (not my poops), home, garden, dinner and then decided it was ok to start her work day at 7:00 am.

This morning TH mom got up with me and we curled up on the futon and I managed to stay asleep until 6:45 am.

I heart her so much that I curled up with her again after my walk and breakfast.

Currently the moms are working on a model that predicts what conditions will create the perfect flat basseting opportunity. Many factors come into play, so we are applying for NSF funding. Would anybody else like to submit feedback and perhaps act as co-collaborators?

ernest tugging the covers as we speak

My most favorite lap in the world came back a while ago.

I'm currently occupying it as best I can, but I'm a lot bigger now.

I have discovered beef jerky. Why did the keep it from for the last 27 months? I love it and will do almost anything to get some, including sit really still in case some was to jump out of your hand and into my mouth.

Other than that, the weather is suitable for indoor roaching. Hopefully it will improve by the weekend, I have many walks to go on.

ernest jerk me not

It rained all day.

I tried to stay dry.

In fact, I slept in.

I worked on my strategy with my advisors -- Bill R., B. Obama and my duvet. Squeaky Pig and Henrietta burst into uproars over some of our ideas.

Whatev.

More later,

ernest super delegates on his side

My TH mom will be home (I hope) soonest.

So, today I sing Happy Birthday a bit early too Miss Brador!

Joey and Tanner's mom and excellent cook and blogger! My mom loves her blog.

Last but not least ---- Tealeaf!

We miss you leafo! Nmom says she's coming to visit in September!

ernest who is squeaking between ringing

ed by nmom: TH mom cannot come home a nanosecond too soon.

Because my mom is running out of things to say about me -- I have been so angelic. I am meming with the best of them - Maggie and Mitch.

1) What was I doing 10 years ago? I was the apple of my grande grande mere's eye - Egret.

2) What are the five things on my to do list today? Go for five walks, run around and bay at my white ball, eat a sweet potato while rejecting the rest of my food, make my mom get me some kibbles, blog for my th mom

3) Snacks I enjoy: cheese, creamsicles, bonios, butternut squash, prada loafers.

4) Things I would do if I were a billionaire. Buy a jet to see my sissy when I wanted to, make sure that all dogs had clean water and good homes, give my moms a raise, make them retire and stay home with me, buy up the remaining open space in seattle and make dog parks and butternut squash gardens!

5) Three of my bad habits. Being a passive agressive flat basset, jumping on people to offset my flatness, doing my commando crawl when I am being passive agressive.

6) Five places I have lived. Rancho Oxboro, Goldendale, WA , Seattle, WA - 98105 and on occasion, the Academy

7) Five jobs I have had. presidential contender, blogger, love muffin, plastics inspector and comedian

You all can play along if you want.

ernest, four out of five dentists want to stimudent him

Do I look like a crow killer?

For the record, I love birds.

Went to work today, was harrassed by crows, closed the wagon hatch so my biscuits would be safe.

Came home, went for another walk, mom then abandoned me and Aunt Carol came and visited me.

My mom came home smelling like bbq and nothing was saved for me.

I punished her by ringing my bell.

My mom said that the end of her reign of terror is near. TH mom made it through line 8, the 72 hour upgrade window for mvpgolds on Alaska and that means that late Saturday night I will get to crawl into her lap and fall asleep!

Yea!

Other than that, its time for my fifth walk of the day.

nmom promises me tomorrow is the dog park.

ernest sniffing for nitrates basset

You know how some Tuesdays feel like Mondays.

This one did for one small basset hound named Ernest.

First, he was awoken from a deep sleep to go on a walk.

He ate breakfast and then curled back to sleep.

Then he was rudely interrupted to get up and get ready for work.

Work?

Yup, work.

It was cloudy, nmom had a shady spot for him and there was a cheese stick as a bribe.

Off to work he went.

A few hours later, it was time for a walk.

The crows are nesting. They get very territorial and the believe that tiny black dogs and their tiny dark haired moms are going to attack their babies.

So, the dog and the nmom are constantly being attacked by the crows.

Baby crows, meh.

On his walk, before which he had a big drink of water, Ernest flat basseted six times. Six times, that means that his nmom had to right him six times. That is bad for her back and his.

He was also ignored by the Aussie shepherd, Bingo, who loves her Frisbee more than Ernest. Good thing that two kind souls came by to smooch him and tell him he was handsome.

When the returned to the bassetmobile, the crows had stolen Ernest's two postprandial biscuits and the rest of his low fat organic cheese stick.

Those menacing crows.

On the way home from work, Ernest went to see his Uncle Mike and got a pawdicure.

Things could only get better right? As much as he likes Uncle Mike, he does not like pawdicures.

He saw Armand, played on his lawn, barked at him. Went for two walks, where he flat basseted when he didn't get his way and was complimented on his looks, demeanor and his stunning personality.

He blushed, again.

Now, after checking the position of his th mom and wondering why it is not possible to create a overlay layer of station abundances on top of the grid so that interested scientists might be able to figure out what the heck is going on, he is chewing on a bone in his kennel.

His best Steve left him a biscuit. His grand mere inquired as to his health and when he would be back for a visit and his pre-bed ritual awaits his bone retirement.

Over and out,

nmom secretary and record keeper of the diary of Ernest the puppy, aged two years, two months and a few weeks

Today I went to my gp&gms house for dinner. Mom gave me a treat, a bird from Cleo. I am in love. I honked all during hors d'oeuvres and then came by to see what was left when they sat down for dinner.

I was pretty good. No indoor boxes were marked by me.

Nmom was home most of the day, doing stuff without bassets, but I did see Minty, Finnegan, Rowena (a person) who met me and I got to jump on and then pulled my stake out of the ground when a golden retriever came by.

Oops.

Instead of bbq, I had a bone. I am still looking for it, it seems to have disappeared.



I'm sure I'll find it tomorrow. Right?

TH mom! Have you seen any dall's porpoises? porpii?

I can't wait until you are home. I need a break from n.mom.

ernest the puppy friend to all

Rain, followed by sun, followed by roaching, followed by passive agressive basset behavior. All followed by frosty paw rejection and gimpy paw.

My nmom went to grand meres and grand peres for dinner and did not take me. They were mad. They wanted to see their Ernest puppy grandson.

I wanted my own turkey burger, hold the pickles.

Tomorrow night the whole J clan is coming over. I hope for some serious head scritching time.

T mom have you located the fish sticks yet?

ernest the puppy

Today it was hot. Not so hot as last weekend, but since nmom abandoned me to go walk 10 miles with the hotties, I felt obliged to be a pain in the arse.

Well, not really, but on our pre-dinner/post nap walk I had to roach and flat basset seven times. She is threatening me with stimudenting during this period so that my teeth get cleaned.

I know Wally's ma ape spends a bunch of her weekends volunteering at the Delaware ASPCA, but my nm mom spends her weekends walking miles and miles and miles without me!

Leaving me at home, all alone, to guard the house.

Poor me.

If you loved me, would you see to donate to her cause and get her less obsessed on making her goal and more obsessed about the final few primaries.

Her page, no mention of me, dogs are not allowed on this event. Whatever.

ernest who is currently wondering if th mom can send him some cooler weather

To whom it may concern:

We're out of ice cream.

love,

e.dd

Raining here, boring.

Hard to chew on a bone in the grass when its taller than Lorenza and its wet.

Guess I'll settle for a frosty paws.



TH mom we miss you. Nmom came home early to mow, but decided that her time was better spent being my cushion.

You have a better lap.

ernest the dry

Poor TH mom:

from www.nws.noaa.gov

...STORM WARNING TONIGHT...
.TODAY...SE WIND 25 KT INCREASING TO E WIND 35 KT IN THE AFTERNOON.
SEAS 10 FT.
.TONIGHT...E WIND 50 KT DIMINISHING TO SE 30 KT AFTER MIDNIGHT. SEAS
BUILDING TO 17 FT. RAIN.
.FRI...S WIND 40 KT. SEAS 18 FT. RAIN.
.FRI NIGHT...S WIND 35 KT. SEAS 17 FT.


17 feet, that is 17 bassets, 5 labradors or 3.5 wolfhounds stacked on top of one another!

yoikes.

Today was rainy.

I went to work with nm mom.

It was quite boring. I did go for a nice walk at lunch.

I had five walks!

Someone asked if I was going to sire a litter.

I blushed.

TH mom is so busy she has not even called us.

We're going to bed.

ernest squeaking like no one's business basset

Hi it is me again.

If you are very excited to see two posts from me, ernest puppy in less than 24 hours, stay tuned.

For the next twelve days its going to be Ernest day by day to keep TH mom up to date with my goings on.

Once again, she's been keelhauled into pollock larvae infested waters to survey their distribution in relationship to other species to determine just how many pollock larvae will be infesting your
fish sticks in about three to four years.



How much fun can that be?

TH MOM - I MISSSSSSSSS YYYYYYYYYYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

The five a day walks, the flat basseting, the chasing after butterflies, the jumping on top of you when you are reading the paper.

N.mom does not have the correct sized lap. K?

ernest basset var. pacificus

Meet Bob, he's a corgeagle (corgi/beagle mix). Is he not handsome? NMom met him while doing a Komen 3 day training walk. She is not allowed to take me on said walks but she cavorts with others. WTF?

On Sunday, my Mama Stephanie came to visit me! I had so much fun jumping on her and catching up with my sissie via her tennis shoes.

The moms were happy to see her and I was so tempted to jump into the passenger's seat and drive to the 509 just to spend time with Phracey.

Oh well. I'll have to wait until August 1. I wonder how many days that is?

ernest basset at your service

Happy Monday.

I have had a week. Lockdown with Skyler, a golden retriever and a joyful
return to my homelands in the 206.

This is my report card:

Click here to see the original, which is much nicer.

I came home and took a nap.



I slept so hard, I snored, which may be due to my smooshed face.



Today I was quite jaunty and hungry. Looks like the week is going to shape up pretty well for a basset, until of course it gets warm. 85 degrees in May? Yikes!

ernest basset made for the shade

Back in the hoosegow again.

Moms are some "faux meeting", one where they pay their own way and walk around describing the gender disparity of space and the ennui of everyday life.

I wonder if Wally's ma ape goes to these meetings as well?

If so, can I put this sign back up?



I put it up at AAG and we never saw here there.

ernest jailbird basset

Two years and one day ago, my moms came to see me for the first time. T mom says she was skeptical about me. She didn't think I was very handsome and thought my sissie, the beautiful Phracey was much cuter and basset like.

I finally admitted to her that I did not think she was so hot either.

She was tall and she insisted on picking me up. N.mom spent most of her time amazed at my tininess and pointing a camera in my face.

I was not too keen on that.

Anyways, it all worked out. She grew to love me for my dark and handsome looks. I captured her heart when the moms to be started off to the car and saw Phracey and I walk away. She thought then I looked more like a basset and less like, I have no idea -- a beagle? A wolfhound? a German shepherd?

ernest free basset for the next 36 hours

Because my mom is a doofus (sorry Joe and Tanner) she posted on her own self serving
bloggo.

To save you the click, here is the story.


Currently in one day lockdown, my lawyers think they'll be able to post bail tomorrow.

ernest jail bird basset

update: I should be out in about three hours.

It was sunny and nmom needed to leave her manuscript alone.

She did not find the roaching as much fun as I did.

She needs a life.

ernest roach basset

Checking things out. Nmom is busy and cranky. TH mom is not.

This post is for my Aunt Carol who misses me.

Hi Aunt Carol!

Look at my big foot!

I am still in the race and a bit hoarse from all that campaigning. My liver is a bit hoarse from all those shots that I had to do to keep up with HRC in PA.

Here's hoping they drink less in Indy.

ernest one day at a time puppy

Once again, the post about my lack of hair is going to be postponed because
someone believes that I, Ernest puppy have a problem with keeping four
on the floor.

Isn't that what all four paws is about?

Using them?

So, the last day they have not been letting me jump or put my paws up on them.

I hate them.

Now, mom logs on and finds this irritating dude who thinks he knows everything because he's on tv.

He knows nothing about why I jump.

He is so not in my cabinet.

ernest four on the floor at all times not basset

Moms were going to discuss my lack of hair on my chest this week, but I decided you
don't really need to know about that right now.

Yesterday the sun shone and bassets went for walks at lunch. They encountered labradors
chasing things and then went off for the chase as well.



I was a tired basset afterwards and flat basseted 7888 times on the way back to the car.

Life is hard.



ernest currently putabing with the best of them

Word to my TH's colleague Terry and his guide dog, Dutton who is getting a Ph D.

Is he not a noble dog?

I didn't get to meet him, but his fur lives on in one of our basset mobiles.

N.mom said he was a sweet gentle boy and I was a bit jealous until I realized that Dutton
not only has to help Terry all day, but at night he has to do homework.

Good thing I came into TH mom's life when she was just pulling out her hair writing
and editing.

ernest puppy ABE (all but elected)

Hola.

Remember me?

I'm running for something.

I'm beside myself this week. Last week, something my grandmere made for dinner did not work well with my tiny tender stomach, so the moms expended much energy to create delicious home cooked meals for me. I loved them.

Then they ruined it by buying kibble that is for dental health.

It was awful.

So, I refused to eat it and pretended I was sick again.

You get the picture?

Now, they are on to me and have bought me new food for canines who desire variety in their lives. Its sort of working, but I'm still holding out for orzo, cottage cheese, steamed butternut squash and organic chicken breast.

Now they are on my case to get my teeth brushed on a daily basis. I am getting more patient, but they are threatening me with another cleaning. I may be a handsome lad, but my breath leaves something to be desired.

When I had my teeth cleaned the last time, my xrays were sent to a doggie dentist who pointed out that my dental care could be better attended to with a electric toothbrush.

Uh, no. Thanks, I'm already tortured by the dremel twice a month, why add to my misery?

Instead I put up with n.mom putting her hand in my mouth and brushing my teeth with delicious poultry flavored goo and TH mom trying hard not to wretch while she holds me down.

Its tons of fun and fun for the whole family.

ernest trying to get the endorsement of four out of five dentists

Blushing down to my toes.

Seriously.

ernest who has a tender stomach today